My husband and I have had a rocky relationship since before our marriage in July 2012. We dated for two and a half years before he proposed. Lots of ups and downs, breakups and separations, but his crooked smile always tugs at me in the dark times.
When he’s great he’s great, can be a true giver, and show love and never sensitivity. My views in him really changed almost two years ago. I suffered a miscarriage, I was torn up about it, he was happy the life we created didn’t make it. Night after night I couldn’t touch him, I was hurting, he was unsympathetic and rude. Four months later I had to have a hysterectomy. I was 24 then. It was a change I didn’t want but had to do for medical reasons. I got sick the week of my surgery with an infection, I was in and out of doctors, driving myself, when I but could barely stand.
The day I was admitted back in the hospital, knowing I was sick he opted to go fishing, over an hour away. I was so sick I couldn’t stand I had to crawl to my phone and plead for him to come home, but he said he couldn’t, my friend took me instead. He eventually showed up which I don’t remember, I was admitted for another surgery and a lonely four day recovery by myself.
I raise his daughter and my two kids from previous relationship, cook, clean, work, but at the end of the day, I feel stuck. He’s not emotional, not comforting, he’ll ask me to help him do something but he’s so anal that if I make a mistake I get reamed. I cannot satisfy the man.
He wonders why I don’t want to make love like we used to. I’m worn the hell out. Mentally and physically. This man drives me crazy sometimes I’d rather him just be gone all the time, and when I want to show him I love him it’s like hugging on a stiff cold wall… Heartless…. But like I said he’s not always like that, it’s rare when he’s sweet, but when he is he outdoes himself… Confused. Feel stuck.